Thursday, August 30, 2012

I'm on Vacation and Already Stressed

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You know what people like to do in Europe? Drink. This is true whether they live there or just happen to be visiting to experience the wonderful, historical, and cultural sites. To some people, the most wonderful, historical, and cultural sites are the bars. To those who were planning on absorbing some worldliness on their vacation by simply dropping everything and living off $10 a day and a backpack, drinking is also a common practice. You can see why this might sound desirable when your vacation isn't going quite as well as you'd hoped. That $10 a day didn't turn out to be enough to even buy a bottled water and your backpack is already becoming a little rank. Or even more likely, you and your significant other are not exactly seeing eye to eye as to how you should be spending your day, or your cash. To illustrate this, I'm going to need a little help.

Stick figures....ASSEMBLE!

And here they are. I'm proud to introduce the Ugly American Tourists: John and Mindy! If you'd prefer, you can lovingly refer to them as The Spaz and The Curmudgeon. Let's see how their trip is going. 

If your trip goes the way of John and Mindy's, you might be tempted to grab a drink at the local watering hole, and likely deserve one. As mentioned in "White Tennis Shoes are Super Sexy", America seems to be the only country which genuinely loves our signature tennis shoes. If you do (don't worry, I won't think you hate America if you don't), you might want to consider mixing it up a little. European clubs have a tendency to employ a dress code. And, while you'd be considered the epitome of awesomeness in a podunk town, those athletic shoes aren't going to cut it. No one wants this to happen...

If it does, you might really need that drink.

Until next time, God bless America.

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